Hurdles

Hurdle 1: Home Pregnancy Test – 9/11/11
Hurdle 2: First Blood Test – 9/12/11, HCG: 50
Hurdle 3: Second Blood Test (HCG should double) – 9/14/11, HCG: 151
Hurdle 4: First Ultrasound – 9/26, saw the sac & baby, doc saw the heartbeat
Hurdle 5: Hear the heartbeat (with 1st or 2nd ultrasound) –
Hurdle 6: Second Ultrasound – Scheduled for Oct 3rd
Hurdle 7: First Trimester –
Hurdle 8: 20 Week Anatomy Scan –
Hurdle 9: Labor/Delivery (due date 5/22/12) –
Hurdle 10: Bring Baby home –

There is a Scrubs episode that absolutely gets me every time I see it: It’s the one where Carla finds out she is pregnant. Upon taking a home pregnancy test, it is announced to the ‘world’ that she is pregnant. A big party is thrown, everyone is happy, yada yada yada. Not so much for those who have suffered loss. No, we know the hurdles and pitfalls that must be cleared before we dare share such exciting news.

During my first pregnancy, my 6 week ultrasound went fine, but not great. The sac could be seen, but we couldn’t quite see the baby yet. I was actually just a day or so prior to six weeks, so the doc wasn’t concerned. Two weeks later, however, we found that the baby never fully developed (blighted ovum). We never made it to the 6 week ultrasound with our second pregnancy – we got stuck on the 3rd hurdle as my HCG levels were not doubling. With my daughter, we were able to see/hear the heartbeat at her 6 week and 8 week ultrasound. It was the sweetest sound I can imagine…except perhaps her wails when she was born.

Today I expected to find myself in familiar territory during my 6 week ultrasound – I figured we would either see/hear the heartbeat (like with my daughter), or we would not see a baby at all (like when we miscarried). No such luck getting a ‘definitive’ answer. We got to see the sac & the baby…but we could not hear the heartbeat (doc says he saw the heartbeat, though). So, better than when we miscarried, but not quite as good as when we had our healthy baby girl. I don’t like my emotions being toyed with like this. My plan today was to tell my co-workers that I was pregnant…but that was assuming I saw/heard the heartbeat at my ultrasound. Now I feel like I’m in limbo for another week (we scheduled another ultrasound for next Monday). I guess I should be thankful, though, that it was not bad news. In reality, there are quite a few more hurdles to pass even if we were able to hear the heartbeat today, so what is one more week for one of the many hurdles?

And for those wondering – there is only one baby. While I would love to have twins or more, I am thankful for a healthy low-risk singleton pregnancy.

The one complication – I do have a fairly large size cyst. This isn’t uncommon for me – I have a similar cyst when I was pregnant with our daughter. It shouldn’t cause any issues other than discomfort for me, but I thought it was worth mentioning.

Prayer requests:
That our little baby would continue to grow and be strong.
That we would see/hear the heartbeat a week from now.
Patience/peace for two nervous parents.
That the large cyst leftover from treatments wouldn’t cause any trouble for the baby.

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